National Lampoon’s Dirty Movie (2010)

Posted April 13th, 2011 by admin and filed in Comedy

Ok, this movie, Dirty Movie, or National Lampoon’s Dirty Movie is a movie about a guy who wants to make a movie that the whole premise of that is it will be telling a single sordid joke. So he goes on a quest to find the most outrageous joke possible. They try to convince the “board” (a bunch of old geezers) that the movie is a good idea. They find people to tell the jokes. Of course the females look better telling jokes topless or better, so why not. The director balks. The budget disappears. Etc. Generally sillyness. The doctor jokes are the best. I don’t know why there aren’t more lawyer jokes! Anyway. Totally mindless. If no one else is watching you’ll laugh at some of it. But remember there are far better ways to spend your evening!
Things learned from this movie:

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Rated R. 90 minutes (1 hours 31 minutes). Swearing. Nudity. Very profane. Makes fun of everyone!

The Killing Jar (2010)

Posted April 9th, 2011 by admin and filed in Action, Crime, Drama

I reluctantly categorize tonight’s showing as “crime” because, yeah, it does deal with crime, but its hard to decide! The Killing Jar, a Michael Madsen driven film about a guy who stops off at a diner late one night after they have heard about a murder across town. The murderer is known to be driving a black pickup truck, which the law officer (Lew Temple) eating dinner there is sure will be easy to spot. What follows is a confrontation, a shooting. A second shooting. A stop by a guy delivering money to Mr. “Smith”, an execution. A questioning, a shooting. A beat-up job, a double murder. Followed by two more killings. All this takes place inside (with a few supporting shots outside) this little diner in the middle of nowhere.

All in graphic detail. For instance, the second killing is of Danny Trejo (of Machete fame – which I sadly never got around to reviewing that fun romp. It started off with a bang, literally when they blow away this really hot nude girl at the beginning. And when you see a girl willing to go naked on screen get killed off so soon.. well… rather sad!). Anyway, I digress, Danny Trejo is the fry cook and gets his head blown off, literally, with a shotgun. You don’t see but a superfast glimpse, but still…

The movie was ok, I guess. I mean I was entertained enough for an already brain dead Saturday night. But, it could of been sooo much better. It is what it is, but you kind of expect to see a better Madsen on the screen. He disappointed slightly. The lead actress, Noreen, was rather cute and a joy to watch (Post-Buffy the Vampire Slayer). But all in all, what do you do if you are faced with a situation like this? Someone goes bonkers in the tiny diner you are at. Are you just royally screwed because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time, or do you do something about it? And how do you decide what you do, or if you just call the police or what? Makes you think a little about what you’ll do if you ever (god-forbid!) get faced with such a situation!

Things learned from this movie:

  1. Diners late at night aren’t the safest of places.
  2. If you go somewhere and they don’t run air conditioning, go find somewhere else to eat.
  3. Serated steak knives are handy in a pinch.
  4. Keep count of gunshots.
  5. You can shoot an entire movie in one location.
  6. Beware of traveling salesmen. Are they really who they seem?
  7. Why do you wear a wedding ring if your wife has been dead two years?
  8. Take the money and run.

Rated R. 90 minutes (1 hours 30 minutes). Swearing. Violence. As for sex, well the most is the law officer verbalizing that he’d like to run away with the married waitress – who is at another point called “hot” as an old broad, and retorts that she’s 32. But yes, she’s hot.

How To Find NetFlix Most Popular DVD Rental

The age old question! How do you find movies to watch instantly on netflix tonight, or if you want NetFlix to ship it to you, how do you find the top netflix movies to rent for tomorrow night? Is there a way to find the most rented movies this week? Well, with the beauty of RSS Feeds, your in luck! I’m going to give a handful of RSS feeds that you can bookmark, and at anytime, just click on them and see the top movies on NetFlix or the new NetFlix streaming titles. So, where to begin.

First, you’ll get an RSS Feed that will look like this:

http://rss.netflix.com/Top100RSS

This RSS feed is the top 100 movies on NetFlix. So what do you do with that? If you click on that or if you paste the text into your web browser’s address bar, you’ll be taken to an RSS feed. This will show you the Top 100 movies on NetFlix and it will be updated for you every two weeks! What do you get,? You get to see the picture of the DVD cover, you get a quick synopsis of the movie, and you get to know where it is in the Top 100. Convenient, isn’t it?

You also can get the New Releases:

http://rss.netflix.com/NewReleasesRSS

Same deal – but this is going to be the newest releases on NetFlix this week, so that hot new movie you were waiting on, this is where you can see it become available as a new release!

But it doesn’t stop there! Not only can you use this to quickly see the movies streaming from NetFlix, you can also find good movies on NetFlix, and you can even see your own Queue from Netflix! How cool is that?

So the beauty of RSS feeds is that you don’t have to actually go to NetFlix’s site to see the results. You can bookmark these in your web browser and from any page you can hit the link and see a pop-up or a full page of a customized view of what you want from NetFlix!

What follows below is a shorthand listing of the links to the various RSS Feeds from NetFlix. See one you like? Then click on it and you should have the option from your browser to bookmark it. Do that and future visits to those pages will be a breeze! I don’t mind you coming back here every time you want to find their RSS feeds, it’ll be ok as I’d love the visitors and comments on my reviews, but you can also just go to NetFlix itself and get these feeds as well. Thanks!

Go to the NetFlix page I’ve linked above from a PC you are logged into NetFlix from and you’ll get a grouping of Personalized feeds for your own Queue and Rental Activity, as well as recommendations, if you like or trust NetFlix recommendations. These are super great RSS Feeds to have bookmarked! You can also share your feeds with others.

These feeds are public, anyone can use.

Netflix Top 100: http://rss.netflix.com/Top100RSS
New Releases: http://rss.netflix.com/NewReleasesRSS
New choices to watch instantly: http://www.netflix.com/NewWatchInstantlyRSS

Action & Adventure Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=296
Anime & Animation Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=623
Blu-ray Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=2444
Children & Family Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=302
Classics Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=306
Comedy Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=307
Documentary Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=864
Drama Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=315
Faith & Spirituality Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=2108
Foreign Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=2514
Gay & Lesbian Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=330
Horror Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=338
Independent Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=343
Music & Musicals Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=2310
Romance Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=371
Sci-Fi & Fantasy Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=373
Special Interest Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=2223
Sports & Fitness Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=2190
Television Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=2197
Thrillers Top 25: http://rss.netflix.com/Top25RSS?gid=387

Enjoy!

movies to watch instantly on netflix

Casino Jack (2010)

Casino Jack is a comedy about true-life events surrounding Jack Abramoff and Michael Scanlon and the scandal he was involved in in the 2000s. How he swindled the Choctaw, Coushatta, and other tribes and other illegal dealings. The movie’s outcome shouldn’t be a shock to anyone who followed the story well. It is interesting to see the inner workings in high places.

Kevin Spacey plays Jack Abramoff and Barry Pepper Michael Scanlon. The movie is well paced, doesn’t overly explain things.

Seeing the things that influential people get to play around with, celebrities, private jets around the world, golfing in exclusive places, fine food, etc, does have its enticements, but at the heart of us all we have to decide what it the price for our ethics.

Things learned from this movie:

  1. Kevin Spacey and his film impersonations.
  2. Jon Lovitz is on a trip in this one! His pen-stabbed face does make an appearance later on.
  3. Barry Pepper’s impersonations don’t go over as well.
  4. Casino Cruise Ships rake in boatloads of cash!
  5. Don’t send hooker’s panties off with your clothes to be cleaned.
  6. Lovitz’s mattress commercial is fun!

Rated R. 108 minutes (1 hours 48 minutes). Swearing. Violence. Nudity, two well-endowed girls lounge about topless for Jon Lovitz. Skimpy outfits on a casino cruise ship.

Hereafter (2010)

Posted March 28th, 2011 by admin and filed in Drama, Thriller

This one was both better than I imagined and also a slight letdown. It’s Hereafter directed by Clint Eastwood and runs a little longer than it probably should. The story basically revolves around three people who are in different parts of the world and yet meet over the course of the film. I know Eastwood’s movies are more often than not great and so you kind of expect that from this one. I can’t put my finger exactly why I felt let down by this one. It just feels like it could of been have much better! Not that it’s bad, I just see the potential. It is a very touching film.

You have a French girl, Marie (Cecile De France) on vacation and there is a tsunami. She’s almost killed. She returns to France and her news desk but can’t focus on her work so is recommended that she take a sabbatical and work on her book, a history of the second best known French politician of the past fifty years. Exciting stuff? She instead starts writing about near death. At the same time a twin set of boys are being separated from their mother and one of the boys is hit by a car and killed. This sets the other off on a quest to find out what happens when we die. In yet another part of the world there is a factory worker, George Lonegan (Matt Damon) who is a genuine psychic. Only he no longer practices because of the “curse” of his gift. He is laid off and his brother convinces him to reopen his psychic studio, only George has no intention of doing so and flees to London to vacation. And its there where the three meet up.

It does ask some good questions and can get you to think. What happens when we die? Do the dead come back to visit, or warn, or protect us? Is it a better place? How can people come back from near death experiences? Are psychics real? I know that many of these type questions aren’t on your mind ever single day so it is good at some points to think about them and decide how you view those questions and what is the answer for yourself. Are you comfortable with them? Watching Hereafter can help you think about this because it brings these issues up in color.

Things learned from this movie:

  1. Delivery truck vs little boy. Truck wins.
  2. Tsunamis are way cool. Spectating only. If your there, wow… its something else! And scary.
  3. Sooner or later your publisher is going to find out what you are writing about.
  4. Charles Dickens can ward off evil spirits.
  5. Cooking classes look kinda fun. Just don’t scare off your partner by reminding her that she was abused as a child and you now know about it!

Rated PG-13. 129 minutes (2 hours 9 minutes). Some swearing. Violence. Fears about death. A child dies after being struck by a car. Subway explodes.

Life as We Know It (2010)

Posted March 26th, 2011 by admin and filed in Family, Romantic Comedy

An evening with a romantic comedy. Life as We Know It is about a single guy, Josh Dumel, and a single girl, Katherine Heigl, who are set up together on a blind date by mutual friends. They don’t work. But their friends get married and involve each of them in their life. They eventually have a baby and Eric Messer or “Messer” (Josh) and Holly (Heidi) become even more involved. When the couple is killed in a car crash Messer and Holly discover they’ve been named mutual guardians of the baby.

Can these two make it work. Will they sacrifice their goals and aspirations as singles to build a life for the child? Or are these two things mutually exclusive?

I guess the premise of the movie is more about “Life as we know it” changing. Are you good with that happening? And if not, why not? You know when you were in elementary school “Life as you knew it” changed when you moved to high school. And “Life as you knew it” changes again when you get to college. And again when you find jobs. And when you change jobs. And when you buy a house. Life changes all the time based on where you find yourself, where you are, and where you want to go. So why not just embrace the present around you and live every day as best you can and extract as much love and joy from the world around you.

But the movie itself has a strange sort of charm. Even for people who aren’t baby people – that’d be me. Strange to see some guy so non-baby and yet go for it so much. And how, while yes this is scripted, he didn’t let these things ruin his life or life as he knew it (haha). So even if no one has just willed you a baby, you can take a lesson from this – he’s laid back and going with it. Making the best of it all. Picking up chicks in the grocery store with the help of the baby (funny scene!).

You can chose a worse film for the evening. If you have a date and need a chick flick, this one isn’t horrid. Josh’s character, Messer, is a technical director for the Atlanta hawks so you’ll see sports references peppered throughout the film. Also if you happen to live in Atlanta you can find all the Atlanta scenery.

Things learned from this movie:

  1. Babies have their uses.
  2. Smart cars are tiny.
  3. New motorcycle drivers should listen to the instructions fully.
  4. Look at yourself in the mirror before going downstairs to greet guest.
  5. Hash brownies shouldn’t be left out for the social services worker to find.
  6. Someone willing you a house is a great thing!
  7. If you’ve had a ball cap since high school, be careful who you let borrow it.
  8. Teenaged bouncy castle set-up crew can be busted and you could score some weed.
  9. Cabbies do not a nanny make!
  10. If you have kids, find yourself a baby whisperer!

Rated PG-13. 115 minutes (1 hour 55 minutes). Swearing. Baby butts.

Obscura Seduccion – Dark Seduction (2011)

Posted March 25th, 2011 by admin and filed in Drama, Foreign, Thriller

Oscura Seduccion, or Dark Seduction, is a departure into darker fare (no pun intended). It’s about a Doctor, Laura, and her clinic. She has just hired a new nurse, Gustav, who is studying to be a doctor. She fears that he might be gay – exactly why, well – because when he came into her office while examining a nude woman she noticed that he didn’t look. “Not my type” he tells her. His type, is it turns out, the doctor.

Laura is a plastic surgeon and you see several good shots of her raw material – why those girls felt they needed plastic surgery, well…!

Eventually Gustav wears Laura down and on her birthday he takes her to dinner. He doesn’t get in, but gets close and sooner rather than later he is bedding the hot doctor. He then moves in. He shows signs of mental instability and possessiveness. She gets fed up, tells him to leave and he goes beserk and tries to rape her and flees after she bites him.

The rest of the film is a where will he strike next as the jealousy of the seduction leads to danger for both Laura and one of her doctor friends. Will she end up getting cosmetic surgery herself from a medical student who wants to turn her into a spitting image of his grandmother/lover? Only watching this – which I’m not recommending – will give you those answers. Or maybe you can bribe me and I’ll tell you.

One bad thing about watching this “type” of film when it is foreign language is sometimes the words distract from what you want to see and sometimes the words cover what you want to see, say someone’s bottom!

Things learned from this movie:

  1. Cosmetic surgery is best done by hot doctors.
  2. One boob lower than the other? Even by just a little? Must demonstrate and get that corrected!
  3. Having a gun for self-defense means that when your there by yourself you’ll just stuff it in a kitchen drawer.
  4. Just because someone stops someone from killing you doesn’t mean that they are your friend.
  5. If someone seems a little freaky, trust your gut.
  6. Sleepwalkers have issues.
  7. Remember DVDs are good for pause and rewind.

Rated Not Rated. 89 minutes (1 hour 29 minutes). Some swearing, but this one mostly contains nudity. Two or three girls have their tops off and perfect bodies on display in the doctors office, the doctor takes a phone call while a perfect bottom sits out on display. And of course, you can’t have a steamy fling without doctor taking it all off. Violence – near death on the operating room tables. Beatings. Gunplay. It’s all good.

All-Star Superman (2011)

A night off the regular movies and a switch to a Superman animation. This one, from DC Comics and Warners Animation, All-Star Superman, is about Superman who has saved an manned mission to the Sun from certain doom. In the process, this trick from Lex Luthor, has exposed Superman to much more Solar Radiation than even he can handle. It’s souped up his energy levels and his cells are now breaking down. He’s three times as strong and fast, but will soon die.

In desperation, Superman tells Lois Lane that he, Clark Kent, is actually Superman. She goes to his super secret hideout and Superman gives her a super serum that gives her super powers for 24 hours. They meet enemies, they fight, they go to Atlantis, they have a grand old time while Lex Luthor, back in prison, works in his lab and confesses to Clark Kent, who he’s always liked, what the world would of been liked without Superman, and how he’s killed Superman – Superman is dying he says. But Lex is destined for the electric chair – reinstated just for him.

What’s the world to do? What will become of newspaper reporting without Clark Kent? Did Lois really believe Superman is Clark Kent? Will Metropolis be saved?

You have to watch to find out!

Oh … and if you don’t want to find out, you still may need to watch just to see the greatest line in the film: “You broke the moon.” :)

Things learned from this movie:

  1. Everyone is always so polite.
  2. Clark can resist fixing a breaking elevated train bridge.
  3. The Daily Planet has the tallest building in the city, yet has only 1 room for newspaper writing. 1 editor, 1 photographer, 3 reporters.
  4. Dinosaur people live at the center of the earth.
  5. Manned missions to the Sun will be possible in the near future.
  6. Time telescopes are a must-have!
  7. Lois is hot in her super-suit.
  8. Lex Luthor is one smart dude!

Rated PG. 75 minutes (1 hour 15 minutes). Cartoon violence. “Sensuality” as Lois takes a steamy room shower in Superman’s lair.

Elizabeth Taylor 1932 – 2011

Posted March 23rd, 2011 by admin and filed in Uncategorized

Sadly Elizabeth Taylor died today, March 23rd.

She was an Oscar winner and star of many, many great films, successfully transitioning from child star to leading lady.

If you haven’t seen many of her films, you may want to see Little Women, Father of the Bride, Father’s Little Dividend, Cat on a Hot Tin Roof, Cleopatra, and of course in The Simpsons.

Check out a full biography of Elizabeth Taylor’s life on Wikipedia.

Psych: 9 (2010)

Posted March 23rd, 2011 by admin and filed in Horror

This is supposed to be a horror movie. Yes, the first jump scene got me – even though I knew they were probably about to pull it. Still …! But Psych: 9 may be fun enough to watch to fill some time it doesn’t really fill the bill for a horror or a thriller movie.

Aside from Micheal Biehn – your stable movie guy from Terminator, Aliens, and The Abyss – the only guy I recognized was Cary Elwes, of the original Saw movie. The rest were unknown actors to me. The real star may well have been the sets as the greenly lit florescent light filled abandoned hospital really looked creepy.

Basically what we have is an an abused and mentally unstable woman being hired to collate records at a hospital that has been closed down. They are waiting on the records to be sorted so that the hospital can be torn down and used for something else. Why no one would just box them up and move them somewhere more sensible to work on them, well … then you wouldn’t have this movie!

There is a creepy guard on duty outside but otherwise Rosyln, the lead, locks herself into the hospital to work. Only does she? The town is terrified of the “Nighthawk” serial killer and so is she, but she’s also terrified of her past, her husband, and startled by the doctor who is working on the fifth floor. She strikes up an acquaintance with him and since the fifth floor is the psychiatric ward he’s obviously a psychiatrist. Soon they are having regular sessions and delving deep into the terrors of her mind and troubled childhood.

It’s kind of a who-done-it? and kind of a psychological thriller only without much effect. It was pretty easy to figure out and if you discount the first very effective jump scene, it isn’t really even scary. Maybe a good date movie?

Things learned from this movie:

  1. Closed-Cuircuit TV systems always make for an extra element of “ooh” scary parts.
  2. Getting a paper cut means you’ll have a good dollop of blood on your shirt.
  3. If you aren’t getting what you want then write it all over the walls as many times as you can.
  4. Cars never start when you need them to.
  5. If your husband brings you pizza it’ll be cold.
  6. Burning rooms always explode just after you’ve scrambled barely far enough away.

Rated R. 98 minutes (1 hour 38 minutes). Language. Violence. Some scenes of Roslyn in her underwear but it stops there. Blood is there, but due to the dark scenes or interior lighting it just looks black.